Tell Me Why [Ain’t Nothin’ but a Mistake]
Billy becomes a mere proxy through which I air my grievances against the world. Is it fair for me to project my own frustrations onto him? Am I asking too much?
“What’s nine times eleven?” I ask.“Uhh…”“Use the eleven-trick.”“Ninety-nine!”“And nine times twelve?”
Billy starts counting on his fingers, but quickly gives up after realizing that 9 x 12 is too unwieldy a summation to subdue with fingers alone. He can’t remember, and doesn’t understand multiplication well enough to realize that 9 x 12 is just a hop-skip away from 9 x 11. And so he gives up, head collapsing into forearms crossed in quiet resignation on the table.
This has become an all too familiar scene, and it leaves me feeling as trapped and hopeless as he does. We spent weeks learning about what multiplication means. Why doesn’t he get it? Am I pushing him too hard? Is it my fault? Am I a bad teacher?
Or is it him? Is he incapable of learning? Have his parents and their liberal Waldorf approach to education spoiled and coddled Billy into a state of un-teachable complacency?
“Okay, shake it out.” I tell him (“shake it out” is our code word for “empty your mind and start over from the beginning”). He lifts himself from the table, shaking his head and flailing his arms vigorously. “Good. Now, again, what is nine times eleven?”“Ninety-nine.” he answers.“Good. Why? Why does nine times eleven equal ninety-nine?”“Because of the eleven trick.”“Wrong. The eleven trick helps us remember that nine times eleven equals 99, but it doesn’t tell us why nine times eleven equals ninety-nine.”“Oh.” He nods in feigned understanding. But I know better.I ask him to open up his journal and read the entry from a few weeks ago when we first started learning about multiplication: “Multiplication is an addition shortcut. It is an easy way to add the same number over and over again.”
Something about his recitation strikes a nerve...
All my revulsion over literal interpretations of religious texts the world over, and the mental slavery such readings impose; all my contempt for a “people’s movement” that perpetuates the superficial form of marriage over the real tradition of love, simply because “that is how it has always been;” all the weight of the world comes into sharp focus over the head of an unsuspecting 8 year old boy…who promptly bursts into flames and dies a shrieking heat-death.
“So why does 9 x 11 = 99? If you tell me it’s because of the 11-trick, I’m going to throw you out the window.”Billy giggles a disarming giggle: “No you won’t!”“Okay come on, I’ll help you.” I write 9 x 11 and its lengthy vertical addition form on a piece of paper. “9 x 11 is the same as 9 + 9 + 9 + 9 + 9 +… 9—how many of them?”“11 of them!”“Right. And 9 + 9 + 9 + 9 + 9 +… 9 is equal to 99. That’s why 9 x 11 = 99. 9 x 11 is the same as adding 9, 11 times, which is the same as 99. Now watch what happens when we add one more nine.”I add an additional 9 to the vertical addition problem. “Now we are adding 9, 12 times. Do we really need to add 9, 12 times?”“Yes..?” he offers meekly, studying my face for clues.“No!" I snarl, slamming my fist down on the table. "We know that 9 x 11 = 99, so we can just skip all the way to the end here, and add just one more 9 to get 108. 9 x 12 = 108. This is why multiplication is called an addition shortcut. It’s okay to memorize your times tables, but it’s not okay to forget why. If you don’t know why 9 x 12 = 108, you don’t really know anything.”I write the word “why” in his notebook, furiously tracing dark blue circles around it with my pen. “If you don’t know why,” I repeat, jabbing the paper repeatedly with the tip of my pen, “you don’t know anything!”
